A chipped nail, a pregnancy test, and a missed spa appointment are a few of the stereotypical concerns women are believed to have. While these are all thru and thru, (I mean who doesn’t want their hair to be on fleek), there are other concerns, the ones that strategically influence how well and how particular a woman is in pursuing her goals. In recent times, women have risen to the occasion, championing career and personal development, collectively breaking barriers and standing up to the disadvantages of societal norms. But even the destruction of glass ceilings come with its own worries. The question thus shifts from “how do I ensure I get hired for this job to how do I perform excellently at my job“; from “where do I find men that can care for me to what strides do I need to take to get my finances in order”. For Women’s History Month, I teamed up with a couple of women who have challenged the norm and made significant strides in their journeys. I asked questions pertaining to their growth. Questions I believed would spur answers that challenged the everyday girl. Whitney Madueke is a young influencer and illustrator who moved to NYC to fully pursue her purpose about 2 years ago. She shares with us,
What was your biggest challenge settling down in New York?
My biggest challenge was finding a job and an apartment. It took a couple of months, which was way longer than I expected, but by God’s Grace, I eventually got both the job and the apartment at around the same time. It was crazy because I had just moved to NYC with little to no money. I needed a job desperately, as well as, an affordable apartment. Getting those two things situated was really tough.
NYC is often lauded as a melting pot of different cultures but it’s also easy to get lost in the sea of people. How were you able to keep your head up while staying true to yourself?
I’ve always taught myself to not follow others blindly. It’s easy to get caught up in the distractions of life so I make it a priority to remind my self daily, what matters and what doesn’t. The best way to stay grounded is to practice discipline, prioritize your goals, and outline a feasible plan on how to achieve them. That is what I do. I’m always doing what’s best for me. I don’t try to compete with others or portray a different lifestyle. I’m pretty comfortable in my own truth and that’s how I stay true to myself.
Was there ever a point after your move where you felt alone. If yes, how did you deal with it?
Haha Yes! Every single day… well most days!
There’s usually a trigger for things like this. It could be watching your friends in Nigeria or London having fun without you. When I find myself in that situation, I deal with it by taking note of what causes the triggers of loneliness and I try to do something to take my mind off it. I might get busy, call a friend to talk for hours, or stay in that feeling just a bit to understand it myself and then try to sleep it away.
There’s no one way for me! There won’t be for others as well because we all are triggered differently. I just tend to combine a multitude of things to get me out of it! Even painting, music or watching my favorite shows help. It’s inevitable as a single woman in a new city by herself with family and friends a million miles away.
Where do you see Whitney Madueke in 5 years?
In 5 YEARS! I hope to have a successful career in fashion design and other business ideas! Really just happy and fulfilled in all that I do! I wanna keep growing and continuously inspiring people to dream, dream BIG and do everything they can to make it happen!
Any last words for women trying to find their roots in a new city or women scared of taking the leap?
Take that leap!! It might be scary but it is worse to not have taken it!
Finding your roots can take a while depending on different things but it’s important to be kind to yourself, to encourage yourself for any effort made and to know that it does take a bit of time to settle! I moved to NYC in Jan 2017, it wasn’t till Jan 2018 that I started to feel more at home in NYC!
I hope the experience Whitney Madueke can prove helpful to women who are trying to find their feet in new places. Leave your thoughts in the comment section. I always love reading and responding to them. To every woman reading this, Happy International Women’s Day from
Girlily !