What Is A Stage 5 Clinger And 29 Signs You Are One

The word ‘clingy’ isn’t new to the multiverse. Even pre-teens know that word well. According to the Collins dictionary, a clingy person is overly dependent on and attached to other people.

Clinginess does get a bad rap, but there are certain ways to deal with it. You can learn appropriate separation techniques and boundaries that tend to yield good results. But if you have ever heard someone refer to you as a stage 5 clinger then you might have an even bigger problem.

What is a Stage 5 Clinger?

If you happen to be a pick-me girl, theres a high chance you might also be a stage 5 clinger. A stage 5 clinger is a person who is completely obsessed with another person who doesn’t feel the same way. Not even remotely. It’s also not always romantic. Maybe you met this person at a party. You all start talking and you’re intrigued. Romantic feelings or not you want to know this person better. So you’re constantly calling and texting and going out of your way to try to spend time with them. I know, this doesn’t sound so wrong and it’s not. It becomes wrong when the person doesn’t feel the same way. They don’t want what you want and you REFUSE to hear or see that.

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Signs You Might be a Stage 5 Clinger:    

1. You always reply one sentence messages with massive paragraphs consecutively.
2. You initiate every conversation you have with this person. 
3. You show up to places you know your crush MIGHT be without being invited.
4. You have little to no social life outside of your crush or partner.
5. You refuse to respect your crush or partner’s boundaries. You just invade their personal space. 
6. You get irrationally upset when your partner or crush doesn’t call or text you back immediately.
7. Everything is always about you and you can never see things from your partner’s point of view.
8. You act like you’re dating and try to rush into a relationship with someone who clearly hasn’t defined whatever is going on with the both of you.
9. You always give your partner shit for wanting to hang out with their friends.
10. You give your partner hell for posting things you don’t approve of first.
11. You refuse to let your partner have a life outside of you.
12. You’re all over your partner on dates, even though it makes them uncomfortable.
13. You go through their phone without them knowing. 
14. You know where they live but they didn’t tell you.
15. You repeatedly stalk each of their social media accounts, as well as the accounts of their close friends and ex-partners.
16. You never let your partner go to any social event without you because you’re afraid they’ll meet someone better than you. 
17. You persevere and grow more intrusive the more they reject you and push you away. Your tenacity is not endearing. 
18. You apply to work where they do or lease an apartment in the same building they live in.
19. You stalk your ex. ALL THE TIME. You have no life outside their existence. 
20. You get mad when they tell you off and swear to never speak to them again but after a few days, you just start again. 
21. To have a reason to see them again, you purposefully leave one of your possessions at their home, in their vehicle, or at their place of employment.
22. Your friends are GENUINELY worried for you. 
23. You turn on post notifications for their account.
24. You ignore every sign they give you to show they are not interested.
25. You met up or hooked up once and you’re already seeing the white picket fence and 5 kids in your head. 
26. Through your stalking, you know their ENTIRE morning routine. 
27. You tell everyone you’re with your crush when you’re not. 
28. You keep telling yourself- This is the last time. This is the last time I’ll ever text them. This time.
29. You essentially gaslight them each time they try to tell you you’re crazy. 

How to Stop Being Clingy in a Relationship

There’s a lot that goes into this, but one of the first steps is identifying why you are clingy in the first place. It might be because you had a friend who left, an unhealthy relationship with your parents or maybe you just don’t have enough to occupy your mind with. Once you’ve identified the cause, these tips should help manage that obsessive need.

1. Expand your network of friends
2. Find activities that genuinely interest you and do them
3. Practice putting your phone away from eyesight
4. Don’t idolize your person of interest
5. Find ways to distract yourself
6. Go for a long walk when you feel your obsessive thoughts creep up
7. Or get lost in a movie that’s dramatic enough to keep you interested